WHO’S BEEN SITTING IN MY CHAIR?
(Spoiler: The patriarchy)
Eyebrows were raised earlier this month when Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan and EU Council President Charles Michel very publicly failed to give European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen a seat at the table during a key meeting.
Entering the room, the three Presidents found only two chairs waiting. The gilded armchairs were promptly claimed by the men, relegating a visibly irritated von der Leyen to the sidelines (a nearby sofa). Video of the incident went viral, to the embarrassment of Michel and Turkish officials, and von der Leyen has since spoken out about “sofagate,” saying it would not have happened to a man.
Predictably, von der Leyen’s critics accuse her of manufacturing drama – if she’d just sat down quietly on her sofa instead of making a fuss, no-one would have noticed the snub.
But perhaps that’s why the incident has struck a chord with so many women. Sexism isn’t always overt and obvious. Often, it’s “banter” that goes a bit far (“just a joke”), it’s a colleague presenting your idea (“be a team player”), it’s a customer asking for the manager when you ARE the manager (“an honest mistake”). Like von der Leyen, we might feel “hurt and left alone", but ultimately we give people the benefit of the doubt, we minimise, and we make excuses – because we don’t want to embarrass others, and because we know no good will come of it. So we sit quietly on our sofa.
As she herself points out, only women with the kind of power von der Leyen holds can afford to commit the ultimate sin of “making a fuss.” So we say – make a fuss, Ursula. Make all the fuss. Fuck being a good sport. Be the petty bitch we all wish we could be.
Whether sofagate was a result of sexism or political wrangling, by not taking it lying down von der Leyen has made sure politicians and organisers will think twice about how they treat women at future events. Next up, stopping men from doing all the talking in the meeting….
TIT BITS
Keeping abreast of the latest news, views, and research
It’s time to talk about pregnancy loss
It's a topic women are expected to stay quiet about. But a recent study looking at
4.6 million pregnancies has shone much-needed light on the topic of pregnancy loss, showing that an estimated 15% of pregnancies end in loss, and 1% of women experience recurrent miscarriages. Plus, the risk for Black women is 43% higher than for white women. Women who experience miscarriage are more vulnerable to certain health problems, and face higher risks of suicide, depression and anxiety – and that’s before we get into the culture of silence around miscarriage. Don’t tell anyone until after your first scan. You’ll have another. It’s just life. Well, no more. As the study authors write: “For too long miscarriage has been minimised and often dismissed. The lack of medical progress should be shocking. Instead, there is a pervasive acceptance.” The Editorial calls for worldwide reform of miscarriage care, and concludes that “the era of telling women to ‘just try again’ is over.”
Daddy uncool
Most of us have heard of the mental load – the planning and organisation needed to run a household that mostly falls on women’s shoulders. A new study confirming that women take on the bulk of parenting admin pinpoints two areas where men are really falling down: anticipating events and monitoring progress. While both parents are typically involved in making decisions such as which school their child should attend, mothers are the ones remembering when the admissions deadline is, and making sure the forms are in on time. GET IT TOGETHER, DADS.
(Travel) sucks in the city
A survey of people living in cities around the world revealed that, from Stockholm to Singapore, women choose different routes and methods of transport than men, and fear of violence is a major consideration. This is not new information. Report author Marianne Weinreich told Cities Today magazine that gender differences in transport use are well known, but rarely considered in urban design: “Women are not a minority but are treated like that unconsciously in this sector, which is dominated by men.” This will be of no surprise whatsoever to any woman who has got the last train home. Or a taxi. Or a night bus. Or just, you know, moved from one location to another.
Sexualised outfits? DISQUALIFIED
Ok, who the fuck decided that female gymnasts should compete in teeny-tiny leotards? Come on, these women and girls are literally doing the splits and somersaults and all sorts of amazing stuff, all while playing Russian roulette with the threat of a “lip slip” (or the lechery of creeps). Who wants to cartwheel while being cheesewired by their own costume? But the tide is turning as some gymnasts turn to full body suits to tackle sexualisation in the sport. We are totally here for women in sport having the choice to cover up if they don’t feel comfortable wearing tiny pants (volleyball, anyone?). It’s about the sports, not the shorts, amirite?
TO THE KRAKEN 🦑
And the award goes to...
The red carpet was rolled out for the Oscars recently, and some amazing women made history by *actually* being recognised for their work (a rarity, we know). Congrats! But as with any event where the press and women happen to be together in the same space, there comes a depressingly predictable deluge of outfit- and body-shaming and “who wore it best” garbage. Ms K has zero time for this nonsense. Frankly, people should just be pleased they didn’t turn up in their pizza-stained pyjamas (we would have). Oscars outfit-shamers can walk Ms K’s blood-red (or wait… I think it’s actually just blood) carpet to collect their awards for ‘Best Boring Predictable Dickhead’. In the meantime, Ms K is waiting patiently for her ‘Best Creature’ Oscar since scientists have recently been filming her mysterious krakenly ways…
More things absolutely not cheesewiring us this week:
Disney princesses take to the therapy couch | Female US marines break new ground | How Henry VIII's wives would look if they'd never met him | A VaVa Womb clitoris bus spotted in London | Tired of romance? Marry for friendship (via the excellent Lunch Hour Links) | Fuck the Tories' new Reclaim the Night necklace raises money for Women's Aid
The HEX Science team
🧬Jean Splicer | ☢ Marie Fury | 🧠 Rorschach Tess | 🔬 Rosalind Frankly